stereotype me

Today is "stereotype me" day or something. Sadly I didn't get around to picking up one of the free shirts which say in large letters on the front...STEREOTYPE ME....and then are blank on the back where you're supposed to write some way you defy a stereotype. We had a housemate discussion on things we might write on our shirts. I noticed a few things.

1) There are not as many stereotypes for white college girls as you might think
2) I fulfil most of those stereotypes

some exceptions are, however....

1) i'm not in a sorority. i hate most sororities. whoops no offense to sororities. not. ok i know some people in sororities and i like those people. just not. their sororities.

2) i have eaten hippo and alligator (do i look like someone who would?) i uh...think that eating the hippo was probably illegal. i have a feeling they might be endangered. also, i think that hippos are really cute besides the fact that they kill more people than sharks. someone just came to our house in ogbomosho this one day though and was like, here, i have a gift of hippo and alligator meat chunks for your family. so we were like, sweet, what the heck, and barbecued it, and the alligator tasted like chicken (obviously) and the hippo was tough and rubbery.

3) i have been a full time janitor. it was an entire summer 40+ hours a week with air conditioning only some of the time.
experiences included:
--scraping waxed in hair off bathroom floors with a putty knife
--really awkwardly walking into appartment suites of lacrosse camp guys and telling them i needed to vacuum
--weirdly really enjoying cleaning couches with upholstery cleaning machines that spray all this water in and then suck in back out like 20 shades darker
--observing team's soap opera-like drama
--discovering what an inch of beer fermenting even further in the bottom of a fridge for nine months looks like
--finding huge respect for people who do this every day of their lives

seriously, when you stay at a hotel or anything leave everything REALLY clean and if you feel nicer than usual sort the sheets into piles. and forget cool stuff and have no contact information.

things i am not:

actually, i like the people in both these pictures. they are awesome. i can't say i've ever dressed up as beer pong or given my squirrel dog an adorbs little matching hat though.